I was met this morning with change. Two friends and I were to meet for breakfast and spend the day reviewing 2017 and envisioning 2018. Over the last two days it was uncertain if this meetup was actually going to happen. And it didn’t. I got to choose how I met this day, this last day of 2017.
My word for 2018 :: choose. Already stamped onto a ring. A lovely reminder on the middle finger of my right hand; every moment, every situation, every minute of every day… I have a choice.
2017 felt like it happened to me. I’ve been here before—feeling like life is happening and I have no control or choice. Life ebbs and flows, and we are human. Sometimes we feel helpless, hopeless and lost. And that’s ok.
I say it often; we teach what we most need. I want and need to be reminded that we have control of how we choose to engage and respond to life and living. I want and need to be reminded to become comfortable with the uncomfortable… because one guarantee in life is change.
Over the last few years, I felt like I was at the mercy of wild waves, being tossed from one to another. Sometimes landing on the sandy shore, feeling reprieve and peace, only to be grabbed by another wave and tossed back into the chaos and unpredictability. It’s not a comfortable feeling.
I have wrestled with some personal challenges. A road I have never traveled. A world unknown. I returned to my codependent ways, naturally and unconsciously. I tried to help, fix, and rescue at the expense of my well-being.
So once again, 10 years later, I’m brought to an awareness of my codependent ways. I am choosing differently. I am choosing to attend CoDA meetings to stay awake and aware. I choose to see the gifts in challenges. I am reminded to not label, judge, and divide but choose to see everything as information. I am choosing to return to gratitude, love, and wonder. GLoW. One day at a time.
I floundered the past 3-4 years, forgetting I had a choice and reacting to what was happening in my life. It is the last day of 2017, I am handing ‘floundering’ over to Spirit. Bye-bye!
With open hands and a hopeful heart, I invite “choose” to be my guide and ally for 2018… remembering, I have a choice.
- I get to choose the narrative of what is happening in life.
- I get to choose to feel the emotions that visit and let them guide me for good.
- I get to choose to be present instead of present-trip and get past-stuck.
- I get to choose to be more impeccable with my words.
- Instead of finding the answer, giving advice and trying to fix myself and others, I choose to turn to wonder… I wonder what the story I am/they are telling myself/themselves is? I wonder why I/they reacted that way? I wonder why that emotion popped up? One of my new favorite mantras… when things get rough, turn to wonder.
- I choose to engage and show up more than I retreat and disappear.
- I choose to see the good and magic in the mystery of life.
- I choose to return to my gratitude practice.
- I choose to pray more.
- Above all, I choose love.
Do you have a word, mantra, touchstone?
A few mantras, quotes, sayings, songs to accompany CHOOSE along the way…
- when things get tough, turn to wonder
- you’re always one decision away from a totally different life
- i am not what happened to me. i am what I choose to become.
- words can inspire. and words can destroy. choose yours well.
- starting my 2018 Choose Playlist here
- feeling states: free, alive, present
Past words and a post on the power of reflecting before moving forward in the new year…
- 2017 Benevolent : feeling nourished after 2 rough years I’m ready to be in service of Spirit and Love. kind, compassionate, caring, giving, warm, humane.
Honor : May 2017 my word changed to honor. Honoring myself, honoring others. Honoring life, grief, death and living. Treating with admiration, respect, reverence.
- 2016 Nourish : ready to nourish all that felt depleted mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. choosing to nourish a life of joy, meaning, and ease.
- 2015 Release : now on overload, I was ready to release what no longer served me, let go, and surrender
- 2014 Receive : depleted from giving my energy I was ready to open myself to receive
- 2013 Rooted : this is where and when my love affair with Mama Earth began to deepen
- 2012 More : more love, more fun, more kindness, more…
- 2011 Move : my song was Bust a Move by Young MC
- 2010 Action
- 2009 Soar : my song was Soar by Christina Aguilera
- Reflecting and right now!
(ps~ a good portion of Susannah Conway’s Unravelling the Year Ahead has you look at the past year first, swoon!)